Transitioning from Public School to Home Schooling
… and the art of deschooling.
There are many reasons why families consider pulling their children from public school in order to home school them. From my standpoint, I’ve always been a believer in public schooling. I mean, geez, I spent over two decades of my life committed to serving public school students. I believe there is so much good that comes from a public school experience, so this isn’t a “Let’s bash public schools” post. You won’t get that here because I have worked with so many incredible teachers who are doing great things for students. I’ve seen the change and growth first hand. And yet… for many reasons… this was still the choice that made sense for our family.
So, whatever the reason, we both have ended up here where we are left wondering… “What do I do first?”
The biggest mistakes we’ve seen families make with home schooling is jumping into academics too quickly and scheduling their day to look so much like traditional school. It doesn’t have to be like that. Instead, we would love to see parents lean into all the benefits of home schooling and get creative with how they schedule and create their curriculum. So… the first step we suggest?
Reshape the perception of school - in your brain and your children’s brains. In essence, erase what they think school is and start fresh.
Deschooling matters.
Here’s why.
Kids were hurt by public school. They may feel stress, anxiety, burnout, or even negative feelings about learning. They may have been bullied, terrorized, or ignored. This abuse leaves lasting scars that need to heal.
Or, they have a preconceived notion of what learning looks like: dependence on the teachers, worksheets, and tests. Home schooling will take time to reset your children’s brains so they are open to new routines, structures, and ways to perform.
You have to deschool because students already have an idea in their head about what “school” is, and if that idea is negatively and deeply rooted in them, it will take some time to deschool.
Therefore, at its core, deschooling is an opportunity to change that narrative. It’s a chance to decompress and rewire the brain to what learning can look like. It’s a time to give everyone space to reset. How long should this last? That’s really up to you! We only needed about two weeks to shift the narrative for our child, but that’s because he had such a positive public school experience. For students who had a rough public school experience, though, deschooling could take months. So it is really dependent on your child and his/her needs. As the child begins to show signs of school positivity, more formal educational experiences can be slowly added into the day. The key is to not just jump right into something drastically new. Instead, pause. Breathe. And be intentional.
Here are what some families I’ve talked to have chosen to do during deschooling:
Local field trips (museums, historical sites, etc)
Exploring interests together (deep dives into passion projects)
Reading a novel together
Exploring nature through hikes
Our son is a big soccer nut, so we did a deep dive into Brazil’s 1970 World Cup team. We put him in charge of this learning and the direction we took. We had no set plan, end date, or outcome for this time. Our only purpose was to make learning - with us! - fun, engaging, and entertaining. Our son found a documentary and limited series TV show about the team, and we watched both together as a family. Those shows naturally brought up a few more topics that were interesting to him - the trophy and Pele. So, we took a trip to our local library, checked out some books, and continued the learning together. At one point, he looked at us and said, “Wow, learning is so fun!” It was then, for us, that we knew we had deschooled enough and that he was ready for the next step.
So… what will you do? What will deschooling look like for your family? How long will it last? You don’t have to have all the answers, but you do need to do it. You don’t have to get it all perfect, but you do need to try it. You also don’t have to be scared of the ambiguity of it all. Instead, lean into it. That’s the best part of home schooling… YOU get to choose the content, pace, schedule, and style your family learns. Embrace the vagueness and help your children discover what they love to learn about and HOW they love to learn. This time will not only be great for them but will provide you with an opportunity to learn how they want to learn.
If you want help coming up with ideas or guiding your family through this deschooling time, that’s exactly what we are here to help with! Through one of our monthly support options, we can discuss your family’s unique circumstances and come up with ideas to best get them in the mood to learn.
You don’t have to deschool by yourself.
-Kristin
